Northern Michigan –
. . . He decides he is cooking dinner and doesn’t get the steak out of the freezer, instead he takes off in his truck to come back with something (that looks like road kill) and then he takes out back, burns it on the grill beyond recognition or it’s pizza from the convenience store at the corner.
. . . He says let’s go have some fun … then he expects you to bait your own hook.
. . . He is going ice fishing, and that he will need some supplies: 4 wheeler, skid trailer, portable ice shanty, portable heater, two collapsible chairs (oh yeah, his buddy has to go too!), new cooler for the warm food that he expects me to make and pack up with warming rock in the new hot cooler.
Then on top of that, will you run down to the Bait Shop and pick up this list of additional supplies: 20 test line, chubs (might as well buy me a new bucket for them too, he says!), hooks, that flaggy thing the pops up when you get a fish, a new skimmer (if I don’t he’ll take the one from my cooking utensil), oh and then to top it off, he also needs toe warmers and hand warmers.
Geesh, do I need to make sure the hot cocoa is not too sweet as he really doesn’t like that either.
. . . He went hunting unexpectedly, because he calls home to ask … Just what’s the deductible on the truck if I hit a deer?
. . . He hurries home to check out the TV to make sure he did not miss the Swamp Masters, Michigan Outdoors and Wildlife Journal.
. . . He says the birthday party will have to wait until after deer season.
. . . He will rub himself down with doe pee and think that I or anyone would want to give him a goodbye-good luck kiss as he is walking out the door. Not me … I start with the disinfectant before he even starts to get dressed.
. . . He brings home seeds, that someone was passing out, that are good for the environment and he wants them planted around your garden and flower bed. You ask what they are, he says they make the butterflies happy. Damn milkweed.