Kids thoughts on Thanksgiving
Five first- and second graders at Maple Ridge elementary school in Somerset were asked two questions: “How do you cook a turkey?” and “What do you like about Thanksgiving?” Their answers follow.
Peyton Marteeny, first grade: “First you put it in the oven at 100 degrees for 20 minutes. You should put in stuffing with spices. I like eating turkey at Thanksgiving.”
Brock Bowers, second grade: “First you go hunting and kill one. Then you cook it in the oven at 655 degrees for one hour. You might put gravy on it. I like the food at Thanksgiving.”
Tyler Moon, first grade: “You put it in a pan and then you take the yucky stuff out of it. You cook it at 13 degrees for 14 hours. Then you eat it. I like to eat the neck, it’s good. You should eat it.”
Allie Lane, second grade: “I don’t know how to cook. I like turkey; my favorite’s stuffing.”
Grace Miller, second grade: “You take the turkey body and you cut the feet and beak off and that red thing that hangs down, too. You put it on the stove for one minute or two. I like eating the turkey best.”
Every Wonder?
- Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
- Why can’t women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
- Why don’t you ever see the headline “Psychic Wins Lottery”?
- Why is “abbreviated” such a long word?
- Why is it that doctors call what they do “practice”?
- Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on “Start”?
- Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
- Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
- Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
- Why isn’t there mouse-flavored cat food?
- When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
- Why didn’t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
- Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
- You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don’t they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
- Why don’t sheep shrink when it rains?
- Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
- If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
- If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they’re physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember.
Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. “Want anything while I’m in the kitchen?” he asks.
“Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?”
“Sure.”
“Don’t you think you should write it down so you can remember it?” she asks.
“No, I can remember it.”
“Well, I’d like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so’s not to forget it?”
He says, “I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries.”
“I’d also like whipped cream. I’m certain you’ll forget that, write it down?” she asks.
Irritated, he says, “I don’t need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream – I got it, for goodness sake!”
Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, the old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment. “Where’s my toast ?”
An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, “Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.”
The gentleman replied, “Oh, I haven’t told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I’ve changed my will three times!”
